This one is a bit better. The same set up, but better drawing for starters. And a tighter, more focused composition.
Doesn't it seem true that the second time that you attempt a particular picture it is better. I guess in the first you are just bumbling along trying to solve problems, discovering other problems after you've finished and in the second you have an inkling of the problems that you will encounter as you go along. I guess a way to deal with these is a preliminary sketch or experience.